this morning i went to a sunrise service at the garden tomb in east jerusalem. while historically jesus was most likely not buried here, the place still is held in a special place in the lives of many people. i had never been there before, but the garden was lovely, and i can imagine it is very serene and beautiful when it is not crowded with hundreds of tourists.
the service itself was good, but occasionally somewhat annoying because of how very american it was. it was mostly singing, with a short message. one of the songs was described as an anthem, and was more than usually american sounding in tune, but the first line stood out to me.
"See, what a morning, gloriously bright, with the dawning of hope in Jerusalem"
i love that idea. the dawning of hope in jerusalem. i haven't been here long, not even two months yet, but i have fallen in love with this city, with this land. but the longer i stay here the more things that back home seemed black and white fade and blur into misty shades of gray. but there is hope.
i want peace. there are few who would say that they do not. but i think that there is something even more sad than a lack of peace, and that is a lack of hope. people here are beginning to doubt that peace is even possible. they have no peace, and they are losing hope.
in my islamic thought and practice class last monday my professor, a catholic palestinian arab from bethlehem in the west bank, told us a little about his life. he said that he had gone to school in the states, and eventually got a green card and lived there for almost twenty years. he came back to his homeland, back to bethlehem, to teach at bethlehem university. he wanted to educate his people. he came with a hope of making a difference, of bringing education to stem the violence and injustice. but that is not what happened.
"It has gone from bad to worse," he said, "I am looking for a light at the end of the tunnel, even just a little candle. It is not there. I cannot see it."
the more violence there is the more those wanting peace lose hope. they begin to think there is no peace, there cannot be peace. without hope, there can be no peace. this city, this land has seen enough of darkness, of night. it is time for dawn.
Sunday, March 23, 2008
Saturday, March 22, 2008
you think you've heard it all....
my friend jenna and i were walking last night to go to a good friday service in the old city. we walk around together alot, and it's not uncommon for us to have men stare and call out inappropriate things to the "pretty american girls". i don't like it, but for my part, as long as they don't try to touch me, i just ignore it. sadly, you get used to it after a while. but last night was special.
we're walking past this guy, deliberately not looking at him, but still aware of where he is, when he starts to sing.
"Dontcha wish your boyfriend was good like me?"
we were barely able to walk past him before bursting with laughter. you've got to give him a point for creativity! he got our attention all right.
we're walking past this guy, deliberately not looking at him, but still aware of where he is, when he starts to sing.
"Dontcha wish your boyfriend was good like me?"
we were barely able to walk past him before bursting with laughter. you've got to give him a point for creativity! he got our attention all right.
Friday, March 21, 2008
good friday
tonight we had a service in st. anne's church in the old city. this church is incredibly beautiful. it was built to be intentionally asymmetrical, with designs on one side not quite matching those on the other. because of its arched stone ceilings, it has a seven-second echo.
the service started with singing, which sounded really cool because of the echo. our director stood and said a few thoughts about good friday, and then we participated in communion. afterwards our attention was directed towards seven lit candles at the front of the church. there were two or three verses read or quoted for seven stages of good friday, and after each section was read, one candle was extinguished. this continued until Jesus gives up his spirit, and the last candle was extinguished. we left the church in silence.
when i was young, i never understand why good friday was called "good". it didn't seem good at all, to me. a few days ago student here at JUC told a story about a discussion he had had with a muslim. this man, who was for all intents and purposes trying to encourage my friend, reassured him that "it is ok, Jesus didn't really die." but what neither myself as a young child, nor this man understood was that without Jesus dying, there is no true life. i still don't like it. i wish i could not believe it, but i am stuck. all i can do is be grateful.
the service started with singing, which sounded really cool because of the echo. our director stood and said a few thoughts about good friday, and then we participated in communion. afterwards our attention was directed towards seven lit candles at the front of the church. there were two or three verses read or quoted for seven stages of good friday, and after each section was read, one candle was extinguished. this continued until Jesus gives up his spirit, and the last candle was extinguished. we left the church in silence.
when i was young, i never understand why good friday was called "good". it didn't seem good at all, to me. a few days ago student here at JUC told a story about a discussion he had had with a muslim. this man, who was for all intents and purposes trying to encourage my friend, reassured him that "it is ok, Jesus didn't really die." but what neither myself as a young child, nor this man understood was that without Jesus dying, there is no true life. i still don't like it. i wish i could not believe it, but i am stuck. all i can do is be grateful.
Thursday, March 20, 2008
mysticism
this morning in my history of the church in the east class we talked about mysticism. at the beginning of class, the professor, a brilliant german woman named petra heldt, laughed as she said we would be covering christian mysticism in one hour. she knew it would be impossible.
as we talked about the ideas of theosis* and the mystical stages of ecstasy, catharsis, and apathy** left me wondering about life, and more than that, life after death. is everything we do on this earth really just done in preparation of the world to come?
sometimes i think that discussing things like what happens when you die is pointless. we will never know, so why waste countless hours talking about what we think. what we think isn't going to change anything. but i can't help but wonder.
i have often imagined dying, the last breaths, those last seconds when you realize this is it, and then they stop. your body is quickly running out of oxygen. are you conscious? do you know when it stops? or do you fade out sometime before death. if so, then when does spirit-consciousness return? when is the moment when you realize, "i'm dead"? does it happen on this earth? or are you immediately in His presence? i've thought about this many times, sometimes even wondering if i'll know what to do. what if i get lost? i wouldn't put it past me.
but i suppose in the end, there is no knowing. i'll just have to wait and see.
______________________________________________________________________
* the eastern orthodox depiction of sanctification. the idea that God became man, through Jesus, so that men might become God. this is not becoming part of God's essence, but rather being sanctified, and are so filled with God's spirit that you and the spirit are one. this can only fully happen after death.
** ecstasy is when a person is entranced with God, when they are "high" on God. catharsis is when you begin to let go of worldly passions. and apathy is when you have succeeded in separating yourself from worldly passions, and are completely engrossed in God. these are VERY simplistic definitions, but i hope they help anyway.
as we talked about the ideas of theosis* and the mystical stages of ecstasy, catharsis, and apathy** left me wondering about life, and more than that, life after death. is everything we do on this earth really just done in preparation of the world to come?
sometimes i think that discussing things like what happens when you die is pointless. we will never know, so why waste countless hours talking about what we think. what we think isn't going to change anything. but i can't help but wonder.
i have often imagined dying, the last breaths, those last seconds when you realize this is it, and then they stop. your body is quickly running out of oxygen. are you conscious? do you know when it stops? or do you fade out sometime before death. if so, then when does spirit-consciousness return? when is the moment when you realize, "i'm dead"? does it happen on this earth? or are you immediately in His presence? i've thought about this many times, sometimes even wondering if i'll know what to do. what if i get lost? i wouldn't put it past me.
but i suppose in the end, there is no knowing. i'll just have to wait and see.
______________________________________________________________________
* the eastern orthodox depiction of sanctification. the idea that God became man, through Jesus, so that men might become God. this is not becoming part of God's essence, but rather being sanctified, and are so filled with God's spirit that you and the spirit are one. this can only fully happen after death.
** ecstasy is when a person is entranced with God, when they are "high" on God. catharsis is when you begin to let go of worldly passions. and apathy is when you have succeeded in separating yourself from worldly passions, and are completely engrossed in God. these are VERY simplistic definitions, but i hope they help anyway.
Friday, March 14, 2008
of en gedi, knives, and pirates
last night myself, jenna, andrew, j.e., christina and shlomy decided to go back to en gedi. we had been there last weekend, but we didn't have much of a chance to look around, so we thought we'd go back and explore, and go swimming, and just have fun. we were meeting to leave at 5:55.
at about 6 we're standing by the gate, waiting for j.e., who had only just woken up, because his alarm had decided to not go off.
we had been told we could catch a bus to bring us to the main bus station down at the end of our street. so we go and stand where we think it might stop and we wait. and wait. some random man was walking down the street, and shlomy decided to ask him for directions. he told us to go further down the street, so we walked down the street, and found another place to stand and wait. and we waited again.
we're still nto seeing any buses, so shlomy walks one way to ask people for directions, and andrew walks the other direction. shlomy comes back, not having gotten any information, so we set off in the direction andrew had gone to try and find him. by this point, we've been standing around for about 20 minutes. we find andrew, who still doesn't know what's going on, and we decide to walk; the bus station is only about 30 minutes walk from where we are. as we walk, we pass two police officers, and andrew asks them about buses. they told us to wait at a certain street corner, so we walk towards it, and stop on the way so shlomy can use an atm. while shlomy is trying atm after atm to try to find one that 'speaks' english, andrew starts talking to this taxi driver, but then shlomy comes back, and we decide we'd rather keep walking. we find a guy who speaks english (yay!) and gives us great directions to the bus station, which we find pretty easily.
being in israel, it is no surprise to us that there is security at the bus station. we all put our bags on the conveyor belt, and step through the metal detector. but then we stop. apparently the guards have found a knife in andrew's bag. one of the guards calls her boss to come over. the conversation went as follows:
security guard: you have a knife
andrew: yes, i have a knife
security guard: why do you have this knife?
andrew: it's a camping knife
security guard: you cannot have this. it is legal in israel
andrew: it is legal?
security guard: yes, it is not illegal
andrew: it is not illegal? so, its ok?
security guard: no, its not ok, it is not illegal
andrew: it is not illegal? so, no problem?
security guard: no, big problem
andrew: big problem. so its illegal, i cant have it
security guard: yes.
andrew: oh, im sorry, i didnt know.
security guard: ok, you have 2 options. you can leave now, and not come in here, or i can call the police
andrew: hmm... how long would it take for the police to get here?
(at this point, the rest of us are standing there, thinking "andrew, are you sure you want the police involved in this?")
security guard: i dont know. when is your bus leaving?
(none of us know, so j.e. jenna and i go to find out. when we come back, the police have been called, and we spend the next 20 minutes or so waiting for them)
when the police finally get there, they take andrew off into a corner to question him. he returns a few minutes later, knifeless, but free to go. he told us that the conversation went something like this:
police: why do you have this knife? it is illegal!
andrew: i didnt know
police: but why do you have it?
andrew: i didnt know it was illegal!
police: hmm... you have 2 options (they like the whole options thing). you can break it, or you can give it to me
andrew: well, its a pretty nice knife, i dont want to break it. why dont you take it. (he says this while thinking "what am i supposed to do, start throwing it against the wall to try and break it?")
so, the next bus leaves in 45 minutes, but blah blah blah, we spend a long time figuring out what to do, before deciding not to go that day because of whether, timing, money, and lots of details i wont bore you with. but before heading back to campus, we decide to stop at the shuk on our way by, and have yet another interesting conversation.
the six of us are standing around in a circle, trying to decide what to do, when we are approached by a man wearing a jacket and tie, and smoking... something. the conversation went something like this.
man: anybody want to get high?
us: um, no thanks, we're good
man: my name is captain jack, who's your captain?
shlomy: yeshua is my captain
captain jack: i need a new crew, do you want to be my crew? (by this point he has started talking in a pretty convincing pirate voice, which he keeps up for the rest of the conversation)
shlomy: no, i already have a captain, my captain is yeshua
captain jack: well, i'll kill him, and then you can be my crew
shlomy: no, you cant kill yeshua. they already tried that
captain jack: well, then, i'll just burn his ship
j.e.: he'll just walk on water
captain jack: well, i lost my woman and my rum in one day, and i need a new crew
shlomy: you can be part of yeshua's crew.
captain jack: no, but he could be part of mine
shlomy: no, yeshua doesn't have a captain, he is the captain
captain jack: does anybody want to get high??
us: no, thats ok
captain jack bids us farewell, and walks slightly unsteadily down the street. the whole time he never stepped out of character, asked questions, looked confused or anything. it made us wonder how much he actually believed he was a pirate.
so, that was my morning. and keep in mind this all happened before 10 am. quite an adventure, and we never even left jerusalem!
at about 6 we're standing by the gate, waiting for j.e., who had only just woken up, because his alarm had decided to not go off.
we had been told we could catch a bus to bring us to the main bus station down at the end of our street. so we go and stand where we think it might stop and we wait. and wait. some random man was walking down the street, and shlomy decided to ask him for directions. he told us to go further down the street, so we walked down the street, and found another place to stand and wait. and we waited again.
we're still nto seeing any buses, so shlomy walks one way to ask people for directions, and andrew walks the other direction. shlomy comes back, not having gotten any information, so we set off in the direction andrew had gone to try and find him. by this point, we've been standing around for about 20 minutes. we find andrew, who still doesn't know what's going on, and we decide to walk; the bus station is only about 30 minutes walk from where we are. as we walk, we pass two police officers, and andrew asks them about buses. they told us to wait at a certain street corner, so we walk towards it, and stop on the way so shlomy can use an atm. while shlomy is trying atm after atm to try to find one that 'speaks' english, andrew starts talking to this taxi driver, but then shlomy comes back, and we decide we'd rather keep walking. we find a guy who speaks english (yay!) and gives us great directions to the bus station, which we find pretty easily.
being in israel, it is no surprise to us that there is security at the bus station. we all put our bags on the conveyor belt, and step through the metal detector. but then we stop. apparently the guards have found a knife in andrew's bag. one of the guards calls her boss to come over. the conversation went as follows:
security guard: you have a knife
andrew: yes, i have a knife
security guard: why do you have this knife?
andrew: it's a camping knife
security guard: you cannot have this. it is legal in israel
andrew: it is legal?
security guard: yes, it is not illegal
andrew: it is not illegal? so, its ok?
security guard: no, its not ok, it is not illegal
andrew: it is not illegal? so, no problem?
security guard: no, big problem
andrew: big problem. so its illegal, i cant have it
security guard: yes.
andrew: oh, im sorry, i didnt know.
security guard: ok, you have 2 options. you can leave now, and not come in here, or i can call the police
andrew: hmm... how long would it take for the police to get here?
(at this point, the rest of us are standing there, thinking "andrew, are you sure you want the police involved in this?")
security guard: i dont know. when is your bus leaving?
(none of us know, so j.e. jenna and i go to find out. when we come back, the police have been called, and we spend the next 20 minutes or so waiting for them)
when the police finally get there, they take andrew off into a corner to question him. he returns a few minutes later, knifeless, but free to go. he told us that the conversation went something like this:
police: why do you have this knife? it is illegal!
andrew: i didnt know
police: but why do you have it?
andrew: i didnt know it was illegal!
police: hmm... you have 2 options (they like the whole options thing). you can break it, or you can give it to me
andrew: well, its a pretty nice knife, i dont want to break it. why dont you take it. (he says this while thinking "what am i supposed to do, start throwing it against the wall to try and break it?")
so, the next bus leaves in 45 minutes, but blah blah blah, we spend a long time figuring out what to do, before deciding not to go that day because of whether, timing, money, and lots of details i wont bore you with. but before heading back to campus, we decide to stop at the shuk on our way by, and have yet another interesting conversation.
the six of us are standing around in a circle, trying to decide what to do, when we are approached by a man wearing a jacket and tie, and smoking... something. the conversation went something like this.
man: anybody want to get high?
us: um, no thanks, we're good
man: my name is captain jack, who's your captain?
shlomy: yeshua is my captain
captain jack: i need a new crew, do you want to be my crew? (by this point he has started talking in a pretty convincing pirate voice, which he keeps up for the rest of the conversation)
shlomy: no, i already have a captain, my captain is yeshua
captain jack: well, i'll kill him, and then you can be my crew
shlomy: no, you cant kill yeshua. they already tried that
captain jack: well, then, i'll just burn his ship
j.e.: he'll just walk on water
captain jack: well, i lost my woman and my rum in one day, and i need a new crew
shlomy: you can be part of yeshua's crew.
captain jack: no, but he could be part of mine
shlomy: no, yeshua doesn't have a captain, he is the captain
captain jack: does anybody want to get high??
us: no, thats ok
captain jack bids us farewell, and walks slightly unsteadily down the street. the whole time he never stepped out of character, asked questions, looked confused or anything. it made us wonder how much he actually believed he was a pirate.
so, that was my morning. and keep in mind this all happened before 10 am. quite an adventure, and we never even left jerusalem!
Wednesday, March 12, 2008
pictures!
this past weekend my physical settings of the Bible class went on a three day field study. the first day we went to the shephelah, or lowlands. we stopped for a while at an old palestinian village. the inhabitants of the village were moved to gaza years ago. the area was full of trees and flowers and caves. it was all very beautiful.
this first picture was taken in a room at this village, looking out through some pillars at the hills.
it is the beginning of almond season in israel, and the almond trees are all in bloom. they're so lovely!
the second day we went to the negev, or desert. we stopped at be'er sheva and saw this reconstruction of an altar that was found there. there is no mention of an altar at be'er sheva in the Bible, so no-one really knows why it was there, but it looks very much like other Biblical altars they have found on other sites.
this next picture was taken on our third day at masada, down towards the dead sea. you can sort of see the sea off to the left of the picture through the haze.
this picture is of a river at en gedi. this place was incredible, literally waterfalls in the desert. after three days of hiking in the dry heat, en gedi felt like heaven.
there were lots of little animals at en gedi. there were these little rodent things that would just sit there and stare at you. they were too funny!
so, that was a very brief version of my weekend. i'll try and post some more pictures and maybe some stories later on, after im done with midterms.
this first picture was taken in a room at this village, looking out through some pillars at the hills.
it is the beginning of almond season in israel, and the almond trees are all in bloom. they're so lovely!
the second day we went to the negev, or desert. we stopped at be'er sheva and saw this reconstruction of an altar that was found there. there is no mention of an altar at be'er sheva in the Bible, so no-one really knows why it was there, but it looks very much like other Biblical altars they have found on other sites.
this next picture was taken on our third day at masada, down towards the dead sea. you can sort of see the sea off to the left of the picture through the haze.
this picture is of a river at en gedi. this place was incredible, literally waterfalls in the desert. after three days of hiking in the dry heat, en gedi felt like heaven.
there were lots of little animals at en gedi. there were these little rodent things that would just sit there and stare at you. they were too funny!
so, that was a very brief version of my weekend. i'll try and post some more pictures and maybe some stories later on, after im done with midterms.
Thursday, March 6, 2008
if you're interested...
i found this fascinating blog. it is written by 2 men, one israeli in a town near the gaza border, and one gazan in a refugee camp in gaza. their english is not perfect, but they're hope is for peace.
jerusalem shooting
so, i was out in jerusalem this evening. matt and jenna and i decided to walk around for a while. it was fairly uneventful, but on our way back, we noticed several vehicles with blinking lights speeding into the city. we didnt think much of it. in jerusalem, theres always police and military around. but we were curious, so when we got back to school, matt and jenna looked up what was happening online.
you can check out the story here and here, and basically anywhere else at this point. im sure there will be many more updates as the information comes in. this literally just happened within the hour.
PLEASE pray! i dont feel in danger, and i have yet to, but this situation has gone from bad to worse very quickly, and who knows where this all will lead. There hasn't been a terrorist attack in jerusalem in four years. God only knows what will happen. please pray for peace, in jerusalem, west bank, gaza, everywhere. i will try to keep you updated on what is going on, both with me personally, and in general in this part of the world.
you can check out the story here and here, and basically anywhere else at this point. im sure there will be many more updates as the information comes in. this literally just happened within the hour.
PLEASE pray! i dont feel in danger, and i have yet to, but this situation has gone from bad to worse very quickly, and who knows where this all will lead. There hasn't been a terrorist attack in jerusalem in four years. God only knows what will happen. please pray for peace, in jerusalem, west bank, gaza, everywhere. i will try to keep you updated on what is going on, both with me personally, and in general in this part of the world.
Sunday, March 2, 2008
lunch in the west bank? why not!
so, today jenna and matt and i decided to go to bethlehem for lunch. we had a whole day off, and i was determined to have an adventure. jenna wanted to take some pictures of the graffiti on the palestinian side of the wall, so we were advised to take the bus that takes us through the checkpoint.
we got on the bus in jerusalem. its about a half hour drive to the security point. when we get off the bus at the wall, we follow the short line of people inside. as we watched the palestinians show their papers to the guards, i realized they were also having to put their hand in a machine to check fingerprints. they barely glanced at our american passports before waving us through.
once on the other side, we were bombarded by multiple taxi drivers, each trying to tell us how far it was to walk to bethlehem center. we decided to walk, anyway, despite warnings that it was five kilometers away. we weren't even sure where we were going, so we just followed where all the tour buses and taxis seemed to be going.
we stopped to take pictures of the wall. the graffiti was incredibly moving, no matter what political or religious stance you hold. this first one takes my breath away. this one wasn't actually on the wall, it was on a building nearby, but i can't get over the imagery of the dove, which represents peace, in the bullet proof vest.
"blessed are those who mourn, for they will be comforted". these words of jesus struck me as both out of place, and surprisingly appropriate in this setting. i wouldn't have expected to see this here. another syaing i saw, that i was unable to get a picture of, said "jesus wept for jerusalem, we weep for palestine"
this next one basically speaks for itself, i think.
"no justice, no peace" and underneath it, "made in america". that was stenciled all over the wall, a reminder of how some, at least, view the american government.
anyway, so after taking pictures we amazingly found our way to the center of bethlehem, which is quite an accomplishment for us. however, we had been told sundays were a good day to go there, but everything seemed to be closed. we met up with j.e. and molly, two other JUC students, and they introduced us to a shopkeeper they knew, named adnan. he gave us juice (true middle eastern hospitality) and showed us a picture of his four children saying he preferred to have just a small family. he also told us why everything was closed. apparently the whole west bank, and even the old city of jerusalem, was on strike as a protest to the violence in gaza these last few days. the death count is up to over eighty people, too many of whom were civilians. he said that there had been a demonstration that morning just in front of the church of the nativity. i was not sorry we had missed it.
we were able to find a falafel place that was open, and enjoyed a quick lunch, before deciding to head back the way we had come. like on the walk there, we heard gunfire in the distance. i happened to glance down one of the streets as we passed, and there we people shouting and running. suddenly two military vehicles that had just been sitting on the corner by the wall sped off towards the commotion. we kept walking, and i was surprisingly unfased by all of it.
so, that was my day. as strange as it sounds, this is all becoming very normal for me. i would ask for any prayers you could offer for those in the midst of the israeli/gaza battles. there are too many people caught in the middle, with no where to go, and it breaks my heart.
we got on the bus in jerusalem. its about a half hour drive to the security point. when we get off the bus at the wall, we follow the short line of people inside. as we watched the palestinians show their papers to the guards, i realized they were also having to put their hand in a machine to check fingerprints. they barely glanced at our american passports before waving us through.
once on the other side, we were bombarded by multiple taxi drivers, each trying to tell us how far it was to walk to bethlehem center. we decided to walk, anyway, despite warnings that it was five kilometers away. we weren't even sure where we were going, so we just followed where all the tour buses and taxis seemed to be going.
we stopped to take pictures of the wall. the graffiti was incredibly moving, no matter what political or religious stance you hold. this first one takes my breath away. this one wasn't actually on the wall, it was on a building nearby, but i can't get over the imagery of the dove, which represents peace, in the bullet proof vest.
"blessed are those who mourn, for they will be comforted". these words of jesus struck me as both out of place, and surprisingly appropriate in this setting. i wouldn't have expected to see this here. another syaing i saw, that i was unable to get a picture of, said "jesus wept for jerusalem, we weep for palestine"
this next one basically speaks for itself, i think.
"no justice, no peace" and underneath it, "made in america". that was stenciled all over the wall, a reminder of how some, at least, view the american government.
anyway, so after taking pictures we amazingly found our way to the center of bethlehem, which is quite an accomplishment for us. however, we had been told sundays were a good day to go there, but everything seemed to be closed. we met up with j.e. and molly, two other JUC students, and they introduced us to a shopkeeper they knew, named adnan. he gave us juice (true middle eastern hospitality) and showed us a picture of his four children saying he preferred to have just a small family. he also told us why everything was closed. apparently the whole west bank, and even the old city of jerusalem, was on strike as a protest to the violence in gaza these last few days. the death count is up to over eighty people, too many of whom were civilians. he said that there had been a demonstration that morning just in front of the church of the nativity. i was not sorry we had missed it.
we were able to find a falafel place that was open, and enjoyed a quick lunch, before deciding to head back the way we had come. like on the walk there, we heard gunfire in the distance. i happened to glance down one of the streets as we passed, and there we people shouting and running. suddenly two military vehicles that had just been sitting on the corner by the wall sped off towards the commotion. we kept walking, and i was surprisingly unfased by all of it.
so, that was my day. as strange as it sounds, this is all becoming very normal for me. i would ask for any prayers you could offer for those in the midst of the israeli/gaza battles. there are too many people caught in the middle, with no where to go, and it breaks my heart.
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