so, i'm home. it's been almost a month now since i stepped off the plane in boston. it's all very strange. it is also very normal, somehow, as though i never left, as though it was all a dream.
i did dream of jerusalem last night. i woke up sad, willing the dream to continue, walking through the narrow, slippery steps of the old city, ignoring the obnoxious comments of the shopkeepers, watching the sun gleam off of the golden dome of el axa mosque, laughing with friends in the student lounge.
i woke up with a feeling of dread, of foreboding, as though leaving was still before me. but it wasn't. it isn't. i have left.
people keep saying i will go back. they mean to be comforting, i know. and perhaps i will some day. but it won't be the same. it will never be the same again. this may seem simple, but it is hard to accept.
there are so many things that i wish i had pictures of. i have nothing to show of the most familiar of places and people. the places i saw every day, and never thought to leave. everything became so normal so quickly. and now i have left.
so, if you are reading this, and were there with me, i miss you. if you are someone i have come home to, don't take it personally. and if anyone happens to receive texts of random trivia, don't be concerned. i am sure it is just a phase, and will pass soon.
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